Conversion

Czech food is dangerous and wonderful. It is a perfect accompaniment to the excellent and abundant beers of the Czech Republic and an efficient remedy to the queasy states induced by consumption of said beers. Czech cooks do not fear salt, garlic, dumplings or the deep-fryer and I commend them for their fearlessness. In a warmer climate, those of a nutritionally puritanical bent might be forgiven for raising questions about the long term health benefits of such a diet. The Czech Republic is a chilly country, however, and adjectives like hearty, warming, solid and restorative are redefined by its climate-appropriate cuisine; to dwell on petty matters like cholesterol misses the point entirely.

At the back of this picture is a bowl of white sauerkraut soup, not a bad dish. In the foreground is the best potato and mushroom soup I’ve ever eaten in my life. To devote all attention to the potato (waxy) and mushrooms (wild) in this soup would be a mistake as the garlic, ‘erbs, and squall-resistant stock were actually what caused all the fuss.

Every single Czech restaurant I visited had garlic soup on the menu. I approve of garlic soup as a default menu option far more than I do the ubiquitous pumpkin soup. Not that there’s anything wrong with pumpkin soup. Me voilà eating garlic soup in the biggest beer-hall in the Czech Republic, at the Pilsener Urquell brewery. Here’s what I think happened. Barley got cooked inside out for god knows how long in a thick garlicky stock made with a smoked ham hock. The chef said, ‘Gosh, it’s almost lunchtime, I’d better do something with this soup,’ and threw in a handful of smoked pork and some more chopped garlic. The chef tasted the soup and said, ‘Gosh, that tastes great, but it lacks a certain something,’ and added, as if inspired by the divine, a handful of sliced brie. The soup was brought to my table. I ate it and was very happy.

I was rendered slightly delirious by the follow-up to the garlic soup: fried blue cheese with garlic sauce. The picture isn’t totally in focus and neither was I by the time I’d cleared the plate. Fried blue cheese with garlic sauce. The description of the dish needs nothing else. It was exactly as good as it sounds and made a walk home in the rain feel like a skippety jaunt through a tropical garden. I had a snooze for dessert.